organizing photos

Photo consolidation:
1. upload photos from phone to Google Drive, then delete to free up storage;
2. transfer photos from Dropbox to Google Drive, then delete to free up space;
3. download all photos from Google Drive to backup hard drive, but keep them to have both cloud and harddrive backups
4. upload photos from laptop to Google Drive, then delete to free up storage.

How many will I lose because I deleted them before I was sure they were backed up? How many duplicates will I have because I was afraid I'd lose them if I didn't back them up again?

Why is this so hard?

currently watching...

Chinese drama:
Tribes and Empires (56/75) better than Game of Thrones. In spite of some major script deficiencies, there are many terrific and subtle performances from most of the cast. I'm not always a fan of the cdrama historical fantasies, but this one has been consistently worthwhile.

Korean dramas:
Just Between Lovers (8/16) current crack. LOVE Junho, so glad he won an award. This is one of the ones that feels emotionally real.

Money Flower (16/24) makjang-a-palooza! but with Jang Hyuk and strong supporting cast, especially Jang Seung Jo, I'm hanging in there to see what grotesque plot twist comes next.

Master in the House (1/?), new variety show with Lee Seung Gi, Yook Sung Jae from BtoB
(who was so good in Goblin), Yang Se Hyeung, and the gorgeous Lee Sang Yoon aka Dimples, who was so damn good in that airport melodrama.

Hwayugi (3/20) terrific, but marred by production disasters. Hong Sisters so snappy dialogue, lots of ghosts and horror, Journey to the West character comedy.

I'm Not a Robot (20/32) absolutely silly but still charming. I have enjoyed Chae Soo Bin in all her big roles this year.

Jugglers (8/16) mostly fun. but I'm running out of steam. Not sure if I'll keep watching. Choi Daniel is entertaining, and the supporting cast is great, but the writing---so much meh.

Bravo My Life (36/60) This drama is so bad, so very bad in so many ways! The set design, the directing, the music choices, most of the writing. And yet... the cast really is chewing the scenery with this trope-y makjang-a-rama, especially Yeon Jung Hoon (uri vampire prosecutor), Hyun Woo. Kang Ji Sub is such a cheesy piece of beefcake, but he's won me over with his comedic timing. I don't know if I can stand it, though.

In the queue: Argon, Wise Prison, Black. 

Hello friend

BTS on New Year's Eve 2017.

Counting down to midnight on New Year's Eve by re-watching all the BTS award show and festival performances they've done since they returned from the U.S. There are five events.

At MAMA in Hong Kong, they did a 20-minute set, with intro video material that drops hints about their next projects (I don't bother trying to figure it out, but they always do it).
Intro + DNA + You Never Walk Alone + Spring Day, then Cypher 4 and a version of Mic Drop with three new dance breaks that were so exciting.

Just a few days later they were back in Korea and performed at the Melon Awards. The set was
DNA+You Never Walk Alone+Spring Day. 

The first of the three year-end song festivals (Gayo) was the SBS show.
The set included DNA and Not Today,

and they finished up with Mic Drop.


At the second festival, the KBS Gayo Daechukje, they had a live band, and began with Spring Day, that incorporated key dance moves from several of their earlier title songs in a dance break at the end. They followed up with a throwback to Lost that showed off the vocal line, then Cypher 4 for the rap line. With the band, they did a rock version of DNA and Not Today, wearing military uniforms.

Finally, their last performance in Korea in 2017 was at the MBC Gayo where they did a sweet version of Go Go, throwing hearts to the fans:
 and then returned to the album version of Mic Drop, rather than the Steve Aoki remix, with all three of the dance breaks they had done at MAMA. At this festival, they performed right after New Year's Eve, and were clearly elated with how they have ended this tremendous year.

Maggie Cheung at the PFA (fall 2017)

I went to most of the films in this series at the PFA of Maggie Cheung movies.  I had already seen Irma Vep, and was out of town for In the Mood for Love, but I saw the rest of the series. Such a star!

Clean (dir. Olivier Assayas) 2004
A heartbreaking account of a mother who attempts to kick her habit in order to win back custody of her child after her famous musician husband ODs. (I did not realize that they were married). She won Best Actress at Cannes for this role.

Comrades: Almost a Love Story (dir. Peter Chan) 1996 Hong Kong. Leon Lai is so hunky in this story of immigrants.

Center Stage (dir. Stanley Kwan) betrayal and survival, in the Chinese film industry during the revolution. The story of Chinese actress Ruan Lingyu who committed suicide in 1935, at the age of 24.

Green Snake (Tsui Hark) 1993.
Snake sisters!

Hero (dir. Zhang Yimou) 2002
Red! Blue! White! Green!

VIXX Shangri La

Oct 22-28:Scorpio season

In a week, my daughter will turn 23. In another week, I will turn 60. Woo hoo, it's double Scorpio time!

Yesterday, I pulled La Papesse: The Moon. Yin energy. Water. Intuition, clairvoyance, connection to the unconscious. Duality, powerful feminine energy. No decision: hibernate, study, connect with dreams and inner knowledge.

 Today I pulled the Knight of Swords. Air of Air. Gallant, active, charging off with good intentions. Not always aware of trampling on others, tactless, steamroller, oblivious to own self-righteousness. This card is my "Joan of Arc" card, that aspect of myself that comes at 3AM to torment me with shame for all the times I trampled on others without realizing it. It doesn't matter if you are right if you are also hurting people. They won't take responsibility for their hurtful actions to you if they feel scalded by scorn.

So, the two of these together remind me that Jupiter is transiting through Scorpio this coming year, and I get to go on a Scorpio growth ride.

So let's make it a Comal flight of tequilas with delicious sangrita chasers!

Oct 15-21: why do I have abdominal distress?

Missed last week , but here we are.

Watching almost ALL the new kdramas, like it's my job. Dropped a couple that are just not good, but still plenty of fun ones.

Tomorrow I have a doctor's appointment. On the one hand, I have lost about 10 lbs, slowly, with the paleo diet I adopted as a way to try to rule out food allergies. I cut out added sugar, gluten, alcohol, dairy, and most starches (rice, almost no corn or potatoes) in favor of fruits, vegetables, and animal proteins. I feel more clear, no longer as bloated, less sluggish, more in connection with my real appetite. I'm hoping to rule out any underlying food allergies by re-introducing foods one at a time to see what happens.
But a few days ago I had a recurrence of a very bad bout of acid reflux/esophogeal spasms, and that little pain in the upper left quadrant of my abdomen that I've been noticing after a meal. It's very localized and now it is also actually painful to the touch. Doing a little research, it seems that I could have a little hiatal hernia, which would explain many of the problems I've been having for years.

I will ask for imaging. I don't just want to take antacids.

The good news: the diet change has had some positive effects. Not being on other medications means that the symptoms aren't being masked any more as their side effects. I'm losing weight as I have planned. I'm eating better.
The not-good news: I may have a hiatal hernia, probably from that bad period during my eighth month of pregnancy when I had such bad diaphragm pain. I may need to take some kind of antacid, or I might even need surgery if it is bad enough. But there are things I can do to relieve the pain and discomfort, if that is what it turns out to be. I will hold off on bringing back foods until I'm able to clearly distinguish these symptoms from what might happen from a food allergy. Right now, it seems it would be impossible to distinguish between the two.

UPDATE: lower intestinal distress of unknown nature, but not esophageal, not a hernia, not an ulcer. Informed that if I am not feverish, bleeding, or completely unable to poop or pee, I just have to shrug my shoulders and live with it, and no effort will be made to diagnose or help me learn what it is. I was so frustrated. I think I need a different doctor. I'm tired of her Kaiser battlefield triage.

Oct 8-14: this week's intentions

I can't wait for the chocolate persimmons to hit the Berkeley Bowl!
This, week there is no session with Marilyn on Monday (libraries closed for the holiday). I could take BART to SFMOMA, which closes Wed. instead of Mon.
I will continue to research internet service providers, although Cindy and Chuck have upgraded out account to unlimited data plan.

I will also continue with the paleo diet. Pat myself on the back for choosing fruits, veg, meat instead of sugar, dairy, carbs, alcohol. I have cooked the shrimp and the butternut squash by roasting them in the oven (tossed in salt and olive oil). I've found myself hungry, because I'm also doing better with portion control and quantity. I'm not counting calories, but I have slowing lost a few pounds. I'm still in that phase where the scale bounces up and down, but this morning I actually saw 170, down from 176-8. It may bounce up again to 172-4, but the trend is in the right direction.

This week, I will walk every day. Last week, I had a few days where I only walked to the library and back (about 1/2 mile total), so I want to do better this week. Today I walked to 4th street, which is a respectable 2.3 miles.

• ✓sun: home to 4th St. (2.3 miles)
• X mon: home to Virginia/Milvia  (.8 mile) and back (.8 mile) total 1.6 miles
• tues: home to Ashby/Shattuck (.8 mile) and back (.8 mile) total 1.6 miles
• fri: home to meeting to West Library (.8 mile + 1.4 miles =2.2 miles) return Libary to home 1.6 miles) total 2.2 + 1.6 = 3.8 miles

travel plans: look carefully at all the travel blogs I have bookmarked.
language study every day

Oct 1-8: this week's intentions

 Johnny and I took a walk by Lake Merritt on Sunday, the first day of the month. Along with a row of cormorants, we saw this sleeping bird and turtle. After brunch, we walked up to the Rose Garden and admired a very nonchalant turkey couple.

I assume this guy is used to being hand-fed, because he let us get right up next to him.

I went over to mom's and helped her clean out her storage room and dispose of some junk. We did not have a talk. I was able to be calm and pleasant. Major accomplishment, yay me.

Last week, I followed through on my intention to start an allergy elimination diet that will also help me jump-start my weight-loss goals. I have stopped eating dairy ( no milk in my coffee! no cheese or yogurt! no cereal!), alcohol, gluten, rice and beans, soy, and added sugar. I'm eating meat, fruit, and vegetables (including plantain and beet chips from the Berkeley Bowl). I am allowing myself the treat of two chocolate-covered macadamia nut treats a day from the box Cindy and Chuck gave me, so that I don't go crazy and rebel. So far, I have lost a couple of pounds, even if my bathroom scale is from the stone age. The idea is that if I can lose a pound a week, I will lose 30 lbs in 30 weeks, which puts me at my target in late spring. I don't need to go back to my original weight, but I would like to be more fit and not have my feet hurt.

 I have also been eating in moderation. That's the key. I am really enjoying my salads, and today I will go back to the Berkeley Bowl to get more groovy salad fixings (endive, frisee, arugula, cherry tomatoes, avocado, pea pods).

This week, I also renew my commitment to walk every day. Last week, I missed a few days because of excessive heat, but the last stretch was good. My walks over the the West Library are a good stretch.

At least fifteen minutes a day (and more if I can) will will do some kind of Japanese or Korean language study. This includes using the phone app for hiragana/katakana practice, and writing out the hangul of dialogues or kpop song lyrics.
Yesterday, I resisted the urge to substitute buying more Japanese textbooks for actually using the ones I already have.

This week I will:

• practice time expressions in Korean and Japanese;
• print out the new will and other documents;
• get new earbuds;
• do a financial inventory;
• read the graphic novels and comics from the library:
• X Gabrielle Bell, Everything is Flammable
• X Satoshi Kon, Opus
• X the three volumes of Naoki Urasawa's Monster (Perfect Edition) 
• X Mimi Pond, The Customer is Always Wrong (read the first volume)
• Alvaro Enrigue, Sudden Death
• 
  
•  

watch: MT: Girl's Generation 1979 (last 2 episodes)
Temperature of Love, 
WTh: Hospital Ship,
Age of Youth 2 (subbed/unsubbed)

also watched: DR Foster (BBC), Kekkon Shinai 

Sat Sept 23-29: this week's intentions

• bloom like this cactus!
• walk every day, at least 60 min.
• take inspiration from Shutterbean, who (like me) likes lists.
• laundry after trip
• wash floors
• get cash
• check credit card statements, bank stuff for fraud after alert
• calendar sync: paper/online end of Sept/October overview
• reply to Cindy
• Doctor's appointment or dermatologist?
• organize bookshelves: make reading list
• organize magazines: collage material
• change all passwords/ record
• finish will/legal docs (print, notarize, file)
• get rid of clothes I'm not wearing
• plan for Inktober! shop for pens
• kana practice: katakana at Crunchy Nihongo
• Japanese conversation: self-introductions
• hangul/Korean lesson: lyrics to a song
• watch list update: 
• S-S: Live Up to Your Name 13-14 X (dcool)
• S-S: Strongest Deliveryman 15-16 DF X
• M-T: Girls Generation 1979 5-6 viki X
• M-T: Temperature of Love 5-8 DF X
• W-Th: Hospital Ship 17-20 DF
• BTS comeback special (viki)X
• Age of Youth 2 subbed up to 8 X
• re-start paleo diet to try to figure out what's causing digestive and allergy issues X
• pantry inventory/restock
• menu planning
• grocery shopping

qu'est-ce que c'est?

Passiflora

with bee.

Garden Buddha

je suis de retour

tentative timeline

December

•  get rid of stuff
• decide how to sell
• Dec 28-Jan 12 scout out SF real estate market, rental vs sales

Jan 13-30:

• finish clearing stuff out
• store stuff for R. with L.
• store stuff to ship once I get an unfurnished place in SF
• list and show place

Drive out to SF with cat in Spring.

It took six months to list, clean, clear out stuff, give everything away, find a place to rent in Berkeley, sell, and leave Minnesota. The cat and I drove for four days, with just a few things in the trunk. I sent myself 9 boxes, using Amtrak. June 2, I arrived in Berkeley, and spent the next little while getting set up.

The cat made it until September and then I had to say goodbye to him. He was 17 and diabetic, but it was hard.

I am back.

Last winter in Minnesota

It just hit me that this will be my last winter in Minnesota!
I will savor the last time I get to

-shovel snow. If I'm lucky, I'll even get to use the snow-blower!

-wave at my neighbors as we shovel snow;

-chip ice off the sidewalk on that one spot where my neighbors' roof melt pools and freezes in front of our building;

-scrape ice off the windshield of my car with one of three different ice-scraping tools I have in my trunk;

-check obsessively to make sure I don't get towed during the snow emergency parking dance;

-model my stylish full-length down coat/Sorel boots/hat with earflaps/ double rag-wool mittens/face mask while enjoying the sensation of wearing silk long underwear;

-say something like, "well, I remember the big blizzards of '92!" or "but this is an unusually warm winter!"

-help someone jump start a car (mine or theirs) "red to red, black to black";

-brake my car and slide gently into a spin on the freeway while practicing turning INTO the spin;

-watch thousands of crows fly the crow highway on their way to roost in Loring Park or at that spot over by I-35, as the sun goes down at 4:15.

-listen to my boots make that crunching noise when the snow it is really cold and the snow is dry;

-feel my breath freeze on my nose-hairs;

-dig my car out of snow drifts, and then practice my well-honed skills of rocking it out of the ice ruts without burning out the clutch.

je déménage

I have decided to move out of this place because I hate my new neighbors (for their noise and disrespect) and I hate my old neighbor (because her first instinct is always to be mean). Too much psychic garbage. J'en ai vraiment ras-le-bol.

First step: an announcement of intentions.  I told mom, Loren and Blas. Yay, me!

Next step: clear out all the the stuff. There is SO MUCH STUFF. If I just do some every day, that will be good. Every time I get mad at the neighbors,  can pack up a bag or a box and slam my way up and down the stairs, ha ha.

I sold almost all my DVDs for about $100 at Half-Price Books. I saved the ones that I know Rosemary might want (about a box full). Several more bags of books are packed and in the trunk of the car so I can go back tomorrow. The main goal is just to get them out of the house, but if I can make enough money to pay for cat care over the holiday, that will be good.

I also took vases and stuff off the top shelf of the kitchen dish cupboard. So tedious to have to wrap them, but I could also take them out to the back yard and smash them to bits with a hammer.

I put the fake tree and a garland out, and someone took them. Now there is a chair, two TV tray tables and a hideous Xmas ornament ball. Let's see how long before they are gone, too [ETA: the Xmas ball and tray tables were gone by morning. Next, the chair!] It isn't supposed to rain or even be cold in the next few days, at least until Tuesday.

What will I do?

1. rent my place to a visiting scholar and have VSM manage it for me 
2. empty it out and get it ready to sell.
3. look for a place to rent in the Bay Area. 
4. go to Mexico for a few months
5. find some house-sitting gigs.

En route!

je dégage

I unfollowed everyone except R on Twitter, and deleted the icons from my browser and phone. I need to stay away because my interactions with it were becoming morbid and enfermiza. Ya basta.

Until I can be in a situation where I can count on sleeping well and not being angry and anxious about it all the time, I will cut myself off from the ugly new. I can seek it out if I need to, but I must make that difficult.

Nodal axis: Scorpio North Node in the 7th house

I am learning about the moon and lunar nodes in astrology


 Here is what Allison Gunn writes on the lunar nodal axis in general.

"Wrestling the Dragon: The Meaning and Purpose of the Lunar Nodes"

"Here’s a secret about the nature of the Nodal axis, best illustrated by the transformation that takes place when the soul is ready to move into North Node behaviors: you become utterly exhausted by your old, worn out way of doing things, and you grow intensely weary of who you have become. You long to jettison the past, and move into new ways of being. You long for it like someone walking through the desert longs for water. It is at this point that you are ready to start doing things the North Node way." 

My natal chart shows Scorpio North Node in the 7th house (opposite Taurus in the first)

Allison Gunn:

 "North Node in Scorpio in the 7th directs its energy to understand the self in relationship to others more intensely than with any other sign. Relationships are the focus of the lifetime, with the goal of understanding the self. However, there’s South Node in Taurus to take into account, and South Node in Taurus wants a lot for itself. This is, not to put to fine a point on it, a rather greedy South Node because it is so concerned with the needs of the flesh and/or the senses. 
Conversely, Scorpio North Node, in its black or white way of being, can go either way; either the focus of the lifetime is all about the lower self, and fulfilling its immediate needs and wants (thereby losing the primary relationship it craves), or the native is capable of giving up almost anything to cleanse its spirit (or make its partner happy). Scorpio North Node in the 7th is capable of great self-sacrifice for her significant other, which is a necessary step to learning how to be fully present in one’s primary relationship.

Nonetheless, Taurus/Scorpio is always a rough nodal axis because the soul’s journey can’t bear the weight of lots of stuff. Any South Node in the 1st is going to have to do a lot of work on the self to learn how to let go of whatever it is this person feels the need to hold on to. Usually, the stuff it holds on to will damage the likelihood of having a viable relationship with someone he or she would like to be closer to. Scorpio North Node has the potential to give up everything, though, if it can pry Taurus South Node’s eager fingers off the bottle of booze or extra plate of potatoes or extramarital affairs he thinks he needs to survive.

Since Pluto and Mars are both considered rulers of Scorpio, how these two planets are aspected will matter tremendously to how the native conducts his relationships. Whereas Scorpio Sun (or other planets) is usually defined as “passionate” about his relationships, Scorpio North Node is in the process of learning how to relate deeply to one special person (or more than one, most likely—life is long, after all). The fact of any North Node experience is that we are in the process of learning how to “do” both the sign and the house; the rest of the chart will either support or challenge this process. 

Taurus South Node holds you back from being fully conscious in your primary relationship when it is convinced it needs something that interferes with the needs of the other person. Taurus’ ruler, Venus, is the sybarite of the horoscope; the combination of Venus ruling the South Node in the 1st means that the native has very little interest in not feeling good (which can lead to irresponsible, self-indulgent, and even crude behavior). How badly do you want to keep your relationship intact? Some people will be forced to give up on you when it becomes clear your needs matter more than theirs; stubbornness can only get you so far.
Scorpio North Node is not an easy path to tread, though, because it requires something that not all charts support: an intense desire to connect with others that isn’t terribly polite. This is not Libra, after all. This individual’s need for his partner can be very raw and open, and can put others off if he’s unwilling (thanks to the South Node) to change. Keeping up with North Node in Scorpio can be difficult too, because the soul is driven to fully understand itself, and so will engage in psychoanalysis, or any other program (usually not aligned with organized religion) designed to figure himself out.
This can take years and a great deal of emotional angst, but South Node Taurus won’t let the native give up. Their process of deeply searching for self-knowledge could make the significant other wonder what happened to the good old simple days when they just had fun, though. This nodal axis should be very careful not to overdo stressing their significant other with their process of self-understanding. Not everyone has your stamina."